mnvnjnsn's Diary

To contact send email to mnvnjnsnATSIGNgmailDOTcom.



Edvard Munchousen's Disease

There's a pattern here I think I'm just not getting.

As some of you may know, I have bad luck when it comes to health. I have a pyramid of doctors I can contact should something break or harden or hurt or bleed or metastasize. The gods require, of course, that I see my PCP (Primary Care Physician, you plebe) for anything, who usually leaves me with a quickie diagnosis and a referral to another doctor, and the process is repeated until I get to The Specialist. The one with the 6 month waiting list, the one with all the plaques on the wall, the one who works at the clinic I have yet to conquer.

So as it is with every Specialist, there is the recounting of medical histories; the listing of current medications and the roundup of insurance paperwork. Oftentimes, there is preliminary bloodwork they need, but don't tell me they need until I show up at the appointment. So there's the driving to the lab and the re-appointing and the waiting and the waiting.

And finally, he enters: The Specialist. Greetings are exchanged, inquiries are inquired, the broken or hardened or hurt or bloody or metastasized area is poked and felt up and other things that sound sexual but are not in any way.

And, invariably, no matter the Specialist or concern or problem or clinic or diagnosis, the answer arrives: Shit happens to diabetics sometimes. That's twenty thousand dollar advice right there. American dollars.

I don't know why I even bother. And yet, I have three more doctors appointments next week.

I. Will. Never. Learn.

3:58 p.m. - 2006-01-06


previous - next

latest entry

about me





random entry