mnvnjnsn's Diary

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Woe is me!

I have to give up the computer at nine, so this will be a short one. I was realizing today as I walked through Safeway in dirty jeans and with unwashed hair that apparently I don't dress to impress anymore. How am I supposed to get a job without that all important fear of being judged?

Well, it doesn't matter.

I've been more and more obsessed with my former office, wanting to hear stories about how they are floundering without me and whatnot. I guess that's what everyone thinks when they leave their job, that the place will fall apart without them. And that's never the case, is it? That doesn't help my bitterness any. I'd like to think I could pull myself up by my own bra straps and get an even BETTER paying job with even BETTER benefits, because my success will hurt them more than anything else, right? But that takes effort and luck and is a lot harder than sitiing at home drinking a beer and imagining how fucked those in power are over there.

And lord knows my writing about it here helps even more.

You know, there are a few free-lance writing jobs out there, but I can't even send them here because I don't want to leave that much of an impression.

Ach, I gotta go now.

8:48 p.m. - 2004-08-03


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