mnvnjnsn's Diary

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I finally got a break, and it's in my car

I'm a schnapps and soda kinda girl. You could say I'm a girl drink drunk, and I'm OK with that. It's been a tough week, in case you hadn't noticed, and I'm very glad it's over. I got paid, so I'm all stocked up on sweet liqueurs and fruity rums and bright blue schnapps and all the good pills and baby, I'm taking advantage of their availability. It's been the first time in a week I've felt good.

So don't worry about me. Go give my sister some love, she needs it more than I do right now. Her husband, my soon to be EX brother-in-law, has made his decision and for that he gets my wrath. Well, not really, I doubt I'll be seeing him again, but it's NOT COOL what he's doing to J and if I ever get a chance, I'll show my displeasure with him in a snide and passive-aggressive way. I'll show him, goldurnit.

Anyway, go tell her she rocks and he doesn't.

So, I got to take this afternoon off, and I used it to run some errands and just not think about work. I met Paul at Starbucks while he was waiting for his car to get new tires put on. Then in a move I really regret now, and I'm sorry I have to say this Paul, I offered him a ride over to the tire place across the suburban mall parking lot. Since I was just dropping him off, I pulled up right at the front door, behind a line of cars parked in front. And, as Paul exited my vehicle, one backed right into me.

Of course, it was a mini-van.

The driver guy leapt out and asked "Isanyonehurt? Everybodyok?" Well, yeah, since I was at a complete stop and you were backing out slowly and steadily, despite the screaming and yelling through the open door, until you RAN INTO ME WITH A SLOW AND SICKENING CRUNCH.

Motherfucker. His van, of course, wasn't even scratched, while the right wheel well on my car is dented all to hell. And since it's a Civic, they'll most likely have to take the whole front apart just to fix the wheel well. As he was writing down his information (thank GOD he's insured), he says "Well, at least it was just an accident. Nobody's fault, really."

Not quite sir. It is, in fact, ALL YOUR FAULT. It is YOUR FAULT that you bought such a huge, ugly-ass van that's five feet higher than a normal car. And it is definitely YOUR FAULT that you didn't look in your goddamn right side mirror, where you would have seen 90% of my car 5 feet behind you.

I'm just pissed because I don't want to deal with the paperwork. It's his fault. My car is still drive-able. His insurance will pay. It's just a fucking pain in the ass, and fucking pains in the ass are exactly what I don't need right now.

One last thing before I pass out. I called my vet today to ask how much I owed them, as I was doling out money and my cats are expensive. The vet tech answered the phone and I told her who I was. She immediately said "Oh, how is Phlyd? I was just thinking about him this morning!"

Yes, the entire vet clinic is in love with my svengali, gay cat.

This just in: Roy, from Siegfried and Roy, was mauled by a tiger tonight. I don't know how to feel about that. It's a Simpsons cartoon come to life. I don't agree with animal acts, and I know they tend to kill the animals who finally revert to their natural don't-hit-me-with-that-stick-motherfucker selves. Yet I know it's not nice to laugh at a guy who gets his throat ripped out.

And I didn't know Siegfried's last name was 'Fishbachler.' Now THERE'S a NAME.

9:52 p.m. - 2003-10-03


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