mnvnjnsn's Diary

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I have an admission that I think might scare people. For those of you who know me, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I haven't admitted this before, and I'm sorry you have to continue to interact with me, pretending everything is OK, even though you know it isn't. I'm sorry I have to let you all in on this horrible little psychological quirk, and I apologize in advance for any emotional consequences that may occur because of it.

I have an inner OCD. If I am left to my own thoughts, I will start thinking the names and nicknames of my cats. I will sing songs with my cats names in place of the lyrics. I will use silly voices or accents. If I am nervous, or have remembered something particularly embarrassing, I will say a name under my breath or out loud. If I am home alone, I do all these things out loud. I am sure the agents who have bugged our house have long since filed my tapes under "Fucking crazy."

I have noticed that my new anti-depressant is making it worse. I nearly yelled out "TANG!" in the middle of a meeting in which I felt particularly out of place.

I'm just a boyfriend away from being the crazy old cat lady at the end of the block. You know that CSI episode where the bratty little girl kills the crazy cat lady across the street with a pen? That's me. Keep your goddamn kids away from me.

Add this to the itchy skin and constrant scratching and I'm one hot mama! Hooo-eey. My poor boyfriend Trevor DunniganTM (that's the alias he chose). I don't know how he puts up with me.

11:16 a.m. - 2003-03-13


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