mnvnjnsn's Diary

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If I have one (good?) thing to say for Effexor, it's that I haven't been full of rage since I started taking it. Not only have I not felt like yelling at someone, I haven't then not yelled at them and instead internalized that anger.

I'm a very angry person, in general. I have years of pent-up road rage; decades of foot stomping and name calling and shaking with barely-contained fury. And yet, I haven't felt like killing anyone recently. Not even the guy that stole my car stereo. Not even my insurance agent, who left the company without telling me. Not even my mother for two decades of inflicting Estelle on me.

I've lost my mojo.

I see why people complain about anti-depressants. Sure, I haven't been drowning in a deep funk, but I also haven't been on any great highs. It's like my life has hit a pharmaceutical plateau, and it's left me with nothing to talk about. I went to dinner with my friends and did nothing but eat my salad.

I was unentertaining, and it made me slightly sad. The only funny part (and entirely unplanned on my end) was when I mindlessly ate two of the free cookies instead of just one, thereby denying my friend a cookie that was rightfully hers. Really, how sad is it that I can now only be entertaining by being an idiot?

OK - I don't have much in my profile, but I'm going to go add a blog that I like because This is one of the funniest and most clever things I've ever read. Seriously. Thanks to Gwenworld for the hookup.

1:18 p.m. - 2003-03-12


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