mnvnjnsn's Diary

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2006-07-19

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Notes from far afield


Do you all realize that Charmin has built an entire advertising campaign around that time honored retort: “Does a bear shit in the woods?” Is anyone else kind of surprised they got away with that? I guess it’s OK for cute bears to shit in the woods.

I’ve been sent to the enemy camp to study their ways and return with valuable booty. The enemy camp? A class in Word 2003. The booty? Better ways to train people. I’ve actually come out with some valuable things, but I’ve spent all day being one of those students. The one who is jaded because she thinks she knows everything; the one who jumps ahead because the rest of the class is too slow; the one who asks specific and off topic questions just to show the trainer that *wink wink* I’m one of you guys *wink wink* I’m not a plebe like these other rubes. I try to not be that person. I’ve had to train that person before and it is truly annoying. No one likes a know-it-all. No one likes the person who feels they need to correct the teacher.

And yet, today’s instructor had written his motto on the whiteboard, one that is supposed to remind the users of Microsoft Word 2003 how to edit things correctly. On the whiteboard he wrote:

SELECT
TO
EFFECT

I ask you, my friends, how could I let that go? For all my trying, it was eating me up inside by the first break and I had to approach him—respectfully, quietly—and tell him, “Dude, you want the verb, not the noun.

At that point, it was confirmed that I was, in fact, one of those people. But come on, he kept throwing in references to past experiences both magnificent and intellectual. It seemed that he and his mustache really needed to be corrected.

Oh, and by the way? I really hate Taco Bell. I use the phrase “You’re good to go” all the time in my line of work, and now I just sound like I’m trying to get my lazy college age son to get a job or move out of the house.

4:13 p.m. - 2006-07-19

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