mnvnjnsn's Diary

To contact send email to mnvnjnsnATSIGNgmailDOTcom.

2005-12-13

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Another casualty in the War against Christmas

Here's an email I sent to those on my christmas card list. I reprint it here because I am one lazy bastard.

Dear cherished friends and family,

Due to the War on Christmas, it is with a heavy heart I must tell you that I will not be sending out Christmas cards this year. Being on the front lines of this war-- and really, aren't we all?-- I feel I must boycott the purveyors of the Godless heathen "Happy Holiday" cards until such time as they realize the true meaning of CHRISTmas.

Instead, I will be blessing each of you randomly throughout 2006 with a surprise greeting. Now, instead of the usual "this is how our year was" letter clogging up your mailbox at the same time as everyone else's, you will receive *personalized* salutations, from ME, via the USPS sometime in the next year.

(Probably on a postcard, but I can assure you that has NOTHING to do with the price of stamps.)

Anywho, I believe it goes without saying that I do wish Jesus a happy birthday, so I won't say it. I just hope the anticipation of receiving a random card filled with the most current news from the Medicine Balls household will bring you joy, even if the rest of the year sucks.

(Which it might. You never know. I may have the power to withhold happy new years from people by not sending the wishes in a card. God works in mysterious ways, just like Bill O'Reilly.)

So, keep your heads held high little soldiers! Tolerance and respect may have won this round, but they can't hold out forever--

And ever amen,

Mn and Trevor Dunnigan-vnjnsn

I got a response from a former roommate that read-- "[Mnvnjnsn]-- mocking the Lord! Good Times!"

PLEASE NOTE: Should any of you dear readers wish to get in on this hot snailmail action, email me at [email protected]. I may have incredible powers given to me by Our Lord Jesus the Birthday Boy, but adding to my address book is not one of them.

18:30 - 2005-12-13

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